Kids Say The Darndest Things

As we’re getting into the stage where the child is talking more I’ve noticed that kids say the weirdest crap at the most random and sometimes inappropriate times. (No wonder there was a tv show about this crap.)

A few nights ago I was changing my son’s diaper, I picked him up out of his crib and proceeded to change him. He woke up and gave me an incredibly concerned look as he stared up at me and said “oh no mommy, my penis is up!” At this point I can hear my husband chuckling in our room, I sigh and tell my son “it’s okay, don’t worry about your penis.” And wonder if I’m really having this conversation with a 2 year old at 3am.

The other day while I was at work daddy was apparently watching The Avengers and our son took an interest in watching it as well. We later got into the car to pick up some groceries when my son shouted “mommy please don’t crash the car!” I glared at my husband and asked why my son was asking me NOT to crash the car. His explanation (whether it was true or not) was that our son particularly liked the part where Loki threw around the cop cars.

Just this morning my child harassed me about putting on his fire truck DVD, I obliged and then noticed that he was sitting on the couch not moving watching the main screen. I told him twice to push the button (yes, my child knows how to work the DVD player.) He looked at me and with an exasperated sigh said “I can’t mommy, I’m stuck!” After actually investigating his statement, no he wasn’t stuck… he was just lazy.

And of course let’s not forget last night’s comments in which both my husband were raising our eyebrows as he sang “penis lights” all the way to the mall… I was trying to justify in my thoughts that surely it was “Christmas lights” but it sure sounded like penis.


About vanitymom

I'm here to talk about not only the joys of motherhood but also the (not so much joys) of living in a high society world that you're judged upon your looks... where I live you need to be a 7 to gain beach access, an 8 to walk around half naked in the summertime and atleast a 9 to hold your head up high. I'm Vanity Mom. I will be talking about things such as parenting (of course) beauty tips for moms, exercise, and eating healthy... all while doing this with a kid biting the hell out of your leg because he's teething.
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