It’s No Longer YOUR House, Its Your Child’s House.

dear golly miss molly THIS IS NOT MY HOUSE

You ever find that with having kids suddenly there are toys in EVERY room in your house? That your child can access every room so everything has to be childproofed, safe, happy, and that somehow your house is no longer yours, it belongs strictly to your kid.

Christmas came and went and I found myself NEEDING to take down the tree on boxing day in order to fit all of my son’s new toys into the family room. I remember the days when he was baby, he had his swing and his play mat taking up space beside my computer and that was more or less it other than the changing pad. Well I look at my family room today and the shelf which once was home to the DVD collection is now a toy shelf with the DVD’s triple stacked on top of one another, the shelf which was reserved for mom and dad stuff has also taken on the life of a toy shelf. There are ABC foam mats going from one free space of the room to the other, there are yellow happy ducks on the wall right underneath my Dali Salvador artwork.

Even the bathrooms have been littered with play toys for the tub or simply because my son decides that a toy needs to placed elsewhere, I now totally understand the fables of movies and cartoons of which parents fall down the stairs and nearly break their necks as they step on toys which lay all over them. Why are there toys on the stairs? Because my son stands at the gate and throws them either up or down the staircase. Even in the most private and secretive domain in the house (mom and dad’s room) there are toys there in which my son has brought in from HIS room to play with while mom has been getting changed or doing her hair.

Personally my thought is if my child’s crap takes up over 50% of the house that he should chip in for the mortgage payments, but alas he doesn’t even earn an allowance yet. Too soon has this townhouse been outgrown and so in a few years we’ll have to look for something bigger, something with three bedrooms, and for sanity’s sake a playroom/den/office or somewhere that I can toss my kid and his stuff and instruct him to play in his OWN space instead of in the kitchen while dad cooks and trips over pots and pans or the bathroom where mom is TRYING to pee and has to listen to playschool music over and over again until my urine is afraid to descend.


About vanitymom

I'm here to talk about not only the joys of motherhood but also the (not so much joys) of living in a high society world that you're judged upon your looks... where I live you need to be a 7 to gain beach access, an 8 to walk around half naked in the summertime and atleast a 9 to hold your head up high. I'm Vanity Mom. I will be talking about things such as parenting (of course) beauty tips for moms, exercise, and eating healthy... all while doing this with a kid biting the hell out of your leg because he's teething.
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2 Responses to It’s No Longer YOUR House, Its Your Child’s House.

  1. Irishstu7975 says:

    I’m not sure you would have needed to even add any words for us to understand this post. We call my 2 year old, “hurricane Eliza” because she can destroy a room in seconds….just started following you today , great blog

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